I'm ALIVE!!!!

This page is dead.. TIme to revive it a lil.. So, Happy CNY, and Happy Valentine's Day in advance.. I seriously don't know what to update here actually.. But just for the sake of not letting this blog die.. So, here i am..

By the way.. Started working on the 4th day of CNY.. Everything was OK.. Except that the office was quite busy..

NOthin much happened.. Had a Perodua Alza for CNY.. Hopefully my new car will be out by next month..

That's all i guess..

May good luck and prosperity be on everyone's side in the year of the dragon..

Emotions Took Control of Me

It's been really tiring to actually cry the whole day.. Especially when you tried so hard to control your tears.. To stop them from rolling down your cheek.. It's not easy.. Emotions are hard to control..

I find it hard to smile for the whole day.. Even when i smile.. It's not sincere.. I kept telling myself.. Everything will be fine.. Everything will be ok.. But things are harder than it seems..

To be honest.. The message this morning.. I'm a little shocked to received it.. I'm a little sad about it.. A little hurt.. But i find it all doesn't matter anymore.. My feelings are not important anymore.. Not even important to myself..

Maybe things will get better.. I just hope it does.. i can blame no one on this.. I can only blame myself.. Maybe i've been too harsh.. Maybe i've been too mean.. It's my own fault that all of this happens.. It happens because of me.. I'm sorry..

I can only hope for things to improve.. For things to get better.. But i'm really worried.. I hope that things will go back to how it used to be.. All i can say is I'm sorry, if i hurt you.. I'm sorry if i've been harsh.. I'm sorry..

Another Week?!

Right.. Another week left, or to be exact, only another 7 more goddamned days, and STPM is here.. See how time flies..

I need a peaceful mind to stay focus.. I need to clear everything off, o concentrate better.. But somehow i just can't.. My mind's a total mess..

I have no time left.. I felt so fucked up right now..

Goodbye social life.. Hello books, again.. I'm so dead!! TT

Discrimination?

Have any of you ever been discriminated or protested against?? I have.. I've learnt something for the past 19 years of my miserable life.. No matter how hard you try to impress someone, it never works.. No matter what you do.. People still judge you..

I'm numb.. I'm used to all these stuff.. People discriminate me all the time.. People misunderstood me all the time.. I felt left out most of the time..

I have my past.. I have a very bad record.. I've been framed, i've been set up.. But does that really matter?? Those who really knows me.. They realized that i have changed.. But somehow or rather, there are still some idiots that judge me according to my past..

Who have no past?? Seriously.. Who haven't done any mistakes?? Why must we try so hard to impress others, when we are leading a goddamned miserable life?? I give up.. Somehow.. I'm not studying to let you discriminate me.. I do not come into this world to be judged, to be discriminated, to be criticized.. Others have no rights to discriminate me as well..

Somehow, my mind's a mess right now.. I don't even know what i'm saying at times.. I can't even think correctly.. I've been thinking about every single thing i did, and all the outcome of it.. Is it really worthy?? Is this how i'm suppose to lead my life?? Is life meant to be this way??

Tears~

It is not a crime for a guy to cry.. That's what Andy Lau said in his song.. Guys are merely human as well.. We too, have feelings.. It is just that ego always take control over guy's emotion.. That's why we don't really show it out.. In reality, guys are not heartless.. It's just that, no one really knows when a guy cry..

Whenever we feel sad, or hurt.. We tend to control ourselves.. Small matter won't make us cry.. But if a guy really cries, it simply shows that the matter involved, or the person involved, really means a lot to him..

Crying doesn't mean that we are weak.. It just shows that we are actually strong enough, as we hold on for too long.. This phrase is not only about guys, but for girls as well.. It's not a crime to cry..

Don't even bother to approach a guy, and ask why is he crying.. He will not tell.. He would probably just lie about it, and claims that everything's fine.. But when a guy cry, we all know.. That deep down, he's not fine at all..

Perhaps every single person have their own perspective on this.. But this just my point of view.. It is not a crime to cry, nor does it mean that a guy is weak if he cry.. It is normal.. Emotions are hard to hide.. Really..

Awesome-Ness Runs In My Blood!!!

OK, guys.. I'ma talk about this movie first.. Seriously.. Watch it.. You will never regret spending Rm 10 to watch this movie.. Way spookier than the first one and the second one.. I enjoyed it a lot.. Mush more paranormal activity compared to the second one.. I'll give a rating of 9/10 for this movie.. Seriously..

Right.. The one-week-deepavali-holiday started.. Struggling to finish the Maths work and Chemistry work Mr. Chan and Volder-Mong gave us.. Still stuck halfway throughout the work.. But damn..

I've been thinking.. Of getting a new car by next year.. Still considering which one to get.. Should i get a...


Proton Saga FLX 1.6
OR


Perodua Myvi Extreme 1.5

OR


Toyota Vios

Still trying to make up my mind.. =/

That's all i guess..

-Peace Out-

Ring-A-Chong-Chong-Ching!

I seriously have no idea what to post up here anymore.. I have exactly 36 more days till STPM, excluding today.. Been studying Chemistry these few days.. Having massive headache thanks to some of the questions on Organics.. Will be doing Physics question today.. I can sense more headache coming my way..

Anyway, it's been some time since i last danced.. I used to dance, to just keep myself cool, keep myself calm.. But it's not working anymore i think.. I can't even dance freely to the flow of the music anymore.. I tried..

I just wished for the examination to end as soon as possible.. That's all.. I already tried my best, memorizing, understanding.. I've tried everything.. But i don't know why.. whenever i see the questions.. *POOF* everything disappears from my mind.. Maybe I'm too stressed out.. Maybe i need to relax a little..

I looked into the mirror, and all i can see i'm getting more and more grey hair.. Thanks a lot.. ==

Right, let's talk about something else.. I'm wondering, is there anyone out there that actually realize the existence of me dear blog? No one seems to be visiting anymore.. Good thing actually.. this means no update request.. Hahaha..

Hmmm.. Time really do fly.. Like i said, I'm only left with 36 days.. And it's already been 4 months plus with her, without me realizing it.. It's fast.. We've been through rains, been through winds.. Arguments are unavoidable, but i'm glad that we always sort the matter out.. 4 months may seem short, but trust me.. When you're in love.. The time period is not important, but the process, the moment you spend with the person you love.. And as for now, i'm willing to give anything just to see her smiling in front of me.. I miss you~~ =)

That's all i guess..

-Peace Out-